Back on my bike

My achilles and calves are still swollen and sore as hell so running has been out of the question this week. I've been icing, foam rolling and stretching every now night. Basically doing anything to try and hurry up the healing process. I've even done a few "leg days" in the gym to try and get some blood in the area.
If I was sensible I would take a few days off.
Only problem is Em's struggling with the stress of selling our flat, she needs a bit (A lot) more sleep than normal so I'm bored. (she's sleeping more than our 12 year old cat.)
Emma and lou fast asleep.

I've tried keeping myself amused with my xbox but a ton of unspent energy has me restless. I've tried going for a walk but always end up going for a sunbed session. Still not sedated but my calves are killing again and I've now got the Skin tone of Dale Winton!! (tanorexic) If I try waking Emma up again for husband/wife bonding time she's threatening to call the police and report me as a sex pest.

Time to blow the dust off my bike! I've always really loved cycling before my love of cream cakes and kfc made it impossible.
I grew up in a village in a valley (Think Deliverance meets little Britain) so mountain biking up and down the hills and dirt tracks was a real love of mine.
Because of the fact that is so freaking flat around hear I decided to buy a road bike. I had no idea of the dirt tracks that are hidden around hear.
I love my road bike; the speed down a slight hill is proper brown trousers thrills. Climbing is even more fun.
Cycle leg of a duathlon at Dorney.
Unfortunately riding out of the main roads of slough to get somewhere good is not as pleasant as it should be.
That's me nicely saying a ton of people driving in slough are half blind, dangerously unaware or psychotic bell ends!
Don't get me started on the cycle paths! One minute you're on the side of the road. Full of drains, potholes and bits of tires, rubbish and other shite. Then on to a busy pedestrian path. Then back to the road with no warning for the traffic.
So straight to the jubilee river trail up to Dorney. After a couple of miles I've decided to start saving for a trail bike or mountain bike. It's a stunning trail and pretty much completely empty. My Road bike is great for racing but not for this stuff.

I think I've dropped enough hints about a new bike! Cough cough! Emma!!

The only other time I took my bike around Dorney. I got a couple of loops around a completely empty lake before I was waved down by a very irate bloke. He aggressively informed me about the no cycling rule. I honestly had no idea. A Olympic venue for cycling used most weekends for triathlons.

He was very upset that I had ignored the very miserable little sign at the entrance.
I politely apologised and informed him this was my first time and had not seen the signs as I was dyslexic.
Wow, did his attitude change.
He told me I was cool to ride on the road but not on the circuit's as there had been too many accident with cyclist and dogs. I almost felt a little bad, lying about dyslexia but was a lot better then having a screaming match or handbag fight.

The plan today was to miss Dorney and travel back to eaton the back way. After dealing with slough's inbred taxi drivers and having my bike really struggling on the trail I was longing to put a few miles on the super flat almost new Road to Dorney boat house use their toilets and back out.

The sky was gray, the wind was pretty strong and it was threatening to rain. Awesome!!! Dorney was completely empty and the back gates to the service Road where open.
Ten pretty quick miles later; feeling a little naughty I left Dorney and headed towards Eaton.

Dorney to Eaton high street on nice big quiet roads. Only a couple of miles from slough and it's almost as if you're in the middle of no where. Even the cars seemed to give me more room.
After a couple of very pleasant, uneventful miles I arrived on Eaton high street. Mid afternoon. Just in time to deal with the random zigzagging of the tourist's and blue rinses; With no idea of the difference between the road or a pavement. I was wishing I had my super soaker or a backpack full of water bombs. Yes I've the mentality of a ten year old but I bet its past your mind a few times.

I really should of got off my bike when going over Windsor to Eaton bridge. Walking in my cycling cleats as absolutely agony so i was buggered if I was going to dismount. Only problem is my balance is shocking at low speed and I'm not used to the bike or being clipped in.
The bridge over looks the Thames and has a great view of the castle so it's busy as hell. Tons of weird Borat look a like's were walking about with there head up their arse's taking selfies or posing for pictures for "creepy bastard monthly" magazine. Weaving in and out was a really bad idea, twice i only just managed to get my feet unclipped and stop myself from falling sideways and turtling.

On the other side; The traffic lights were green. This is the start of a really cool short but steep hill up the side of the castle. Its also a really popular strada timed segment. It was a great run to the top. fifty five seconds of stomping on the peddles later and I had a little whoop whoop moment as I smashed my pb. Who says i'm not not a competive arse hole.
I continued through windsor and entered the great park. This place is amazing. Miles upon miles of smooth roads and some great hills doing circles around very small villages all servicing what is essentially the Queens back garden.
I'm not sure how I feel about one small family owning such unbelievable wealth but at least most of it is open to the public.
After a couple of random loops I was pretty much spent. I was starting to get cramps and get really irritable. So I give the emergency services (Emma) a call.
"I'll see you at Bracknell for a steam and sauna" No real idea where I was I got the navigation up on my phone and exited the park.
Ten mins later I was on Ascot high Street. That's when things started to get fun. I was tired and Ascot was a real free for all. One second you're on the pedestrian path/cycle lane weaving between the blue rinse brigade and the mum's with buggy's. Then your on the side of the road playing whacky race's with some stunning sports cars. Definitely some where to avoid riding down in the future.
After Ascot it's one long straight road, slightly downhill. I didn't even get stopped by traffic lights.
Another quick text to Em. "change of plans see you at subway"
Greatest six inches of my life later we chucked the bike in the back of the car and went swimming.